Being kind to yourself

Hey you, you're fat / stupid / ugly / unlucky. You're never going to get that job / partner / lucky break; who are you to think you will?

I would imagine you're reading these words and thinking crikey who on earth would speak to someone in that way? And yet we routinely speak to ourselves like that, the words may be different but I bet there isn't one person reading this who hasn't rubbished themselves at one time or another, often for really minor misdemeanors.

We put such high expectations on ourselves and yet we sometimes don't extend ourselves the same kindness and support that we would do to a good friend. Criticism withers whilst praise boosts and encourages, that applies whether it's to another person or just to ourselves. I know that for most people the 'rah rah, I'm fabulous, I can walk on water' approach is simply a bridge too far, but if we could even stop with the negative self-talk, it would be a huge step in the right direction and you will definitely begin to see a difference in how you feel, how you appear to others and also to your success.

Your unconscious mind is responsible for all your habits and behaviours and it quite literally believes everything you tell it, whether that's real or imagined, so can you see why it's so damaging to keep on putting yourself down? Even things that you consider to be quite harmless and might say on a really regular basis like 'I'm so forgetful, if it wasn't screwed on I'd forget my head'! Your unconscious mind will believe this and because it's like a child who always wants to be right, it will then begin to seek out situations to confirm these beliefs. Which is then likely to make you more forgetful.

Just for the day, could you treat yourself like a best friend? Be honest, challenge, be critical even. But do it from a kind and supportive perspective. Focus on the good things you've achieved that week / day even hour if necessary, and give yourself a break!

'Where your thoughts go, your energy flows' think about this too: is your energy flowing to the great things you are and what you achieve in your life, or is it going to the habits and traits you would rather be free of? By giving anything space in your head, whether that's forgetfulness, a bad diet, or a fluffed presentation; you are continuing to breathe life into it.

Go on, give it a go :)